heartbreak number 437

[While folks on the Mainland daydream about romantic Hawaii, I sometimes daydream about how people live on the Mainland. I mostly see them on cable TV. You know, people like Ross and Rachel. The following short short story is from The Breakup Queen, a collection of 18 contemporary Hawaii writers.]

"Heartbreak Number 437"

Ross has entered the Twilight Zone. He stares at the television screen, not believing what he is seeing and hearing. His mind and body still heavy with sleep, he is a bear just emerging from a long hibernation. His surroundings are familiar, the same apartment and furniture, the same large window, but something is missing. It’s quiet, too quiet. Where are the voices? All those voices, the voices of friends, the voices of what has now become his past, reduced to the faintest of echoes. What the hell has happened to his world?

He moves closer to the TV, studying the young woman, her familiar voice the only one remaining from the old gang. She is beautiful and sad, and all the more beautiful for her sadness. Why does the woman interviewing her keep calling her Jennifer? Her real name is Rachel. His Rachel.

“Hey, hey,” Ross says, recovering his power of speech, fairly eloquent for a bear just out of hibernation. “Hey, hey, hey.” More eloquent yet. “Hey, Rachel, it’s me,” his small bear voice pleads. He kneels in front of the TV, his face only a foot from her image, but Rachel ignores him, pretending to be Jennifer, talking about what has made her so sad.

It’s all about someone named Brad. Ross tries to follow what the two women are saying about Brad. It makes no sense. Ross believes, for a moment, that Rachel must have a twin sister named Jennifer, that it is Jennifer who has gotten mixed up with this Brad character and Brad has broken her heart. Poor Jennifer. When Rachel walks in the door, Ross will ask her why she never told him she had a twin sister, and ask if there is anything they can do to make her feel better.

Just then Jennifer looks into the camera and she and Ross are eye-to-eye. In that instant the twin sister theory evaporates and Ross is looking at Rachel. She is saying how lonely she has been. Now Ross is just as lonely as she is, which he finds strangely comforting.

Rachel begins talking about what Brad did with another woman. She says that Brad is missing a sensitivity chip. Sensitivity chip? Ross brightens. “Hey, Rachel,” he says. “It’s me, Ross.” He jumps to his feet, his arms spread now, the bear man ready for action. “You know I have a sensitivity chip,” he says. “Remember?” He has stopped listening to the interview on the screen. “Remember how sensitive I am? If I were any more sensitive I’d be gay!”

Ross walks briskly to the window. The sky has lightened. He feels the warm sun on his face. Another spring has arrived. Rachel will be home soon. She will remember him and forget all about Brad. Maybe the voices will return as well. The old friends. Ross waits by the window.